What will be next?

Finally, I took an important decision... I have been thinking about it for weeks now, and now it is kind of "official".

So here the summary :) :

I came to Norway September 2007 to do my AIESEC internship in ELECTROLUX. After 6 months working in the company, my manager offered me the opportunity to extend my contract for 6 months more (that means until march 2009). And as you can guess (because I am still in ELectrolux Norway) I said YES!
My internship has been a great experience (but it is not over yet, still have some months left). I have learnt a lot and got much more reponsabilities than what I could expected. My job (I am working as a Finance Controller) is really good. I like finance and these last months I have been working much more closer to the business and the market.
But to go back to the point, beginning of September my manager told me that they would like to offer me a real position here in the company after my internship. I think at this time I was not expecting this kind of offer (because of different reasons I didn't think they will open a new position but will prefer to take a new intern) and actually I started to be really confused.
Then I have started thinking and thinking... A LOT!! maybe too much... and I probably put a lot of pressure on me too. And all that didn't give me any answers.

What I saw first in my reflection was:
- great job,
- great quality of life. I never saw a country before where the quality of life is good as Norway. Ok, everything is so expensive here, but life is great. Working hours are from 8am to 4pm, you can practice sports everywhere, no stress at all in Oslo, you can walk in the city at any time of the day or night without being scared, from the city center of Oslo you take a subway for 10 minutes and you are in the forest or a boat for 5 minutes and you arrive in a desert island in the middle of the Oslo Fjord... Norway is a cool country to enjoy life :)
- great salary
So my conclusion was : everything is great, then I should stay. But I was not feeling confident with my conclusion...
(just to say 2 words about Norway and Interns: most of the AIESEC interns coming for an internship to Norway have been hiring by the company after the internship period. It is something really common here)

My second part of my reflection was more talking with some good friends. From this moment I started thinking in a different way... one special friend really opened my eyes, and from my discussion with him I realized that even if everything around me can be so perfect and great, it is not because of that I will enjoy it!! I mean you can live in the perfect world, in the perfect country, do you think that wil be enough to make you happy? But that really hard to think in a different way when you are in a environment when people think like this (one intern even told me once: "but what the most important at the end of the day? the money of course!")

So some days I was feeling staying, some others days leaving...It has been going like that for weeks. But of course I went deeper to my reflection and tried to think about what I really want in life, in my professional career etc etc.
Here some of my answers of the questions "what do I want?"
- new challenge
- to work in a young environment
- to work in a team
- SUN!!! I need sun!!
- to follow my dreams and not the standards of others
- to inspire people
- to travel
- but the most important, I don't want to postpone living!! I mean I want to live now my dreams! I don't want to wait years before achieving them!

So after this long reflection I realized that what I want it is not necessary what I have today. I enjoy my job but for example I am the only young and international person in the company in Oslo. I would like to work in a different working environment: more international, dynamic and younger! I would like to have more interaction with people in my daily work and be part of a team.
I am maybe looking for the perfect job and I want or expect probably too much, but I know today that I want something different, I want a change!!
Aditionally to that, I think I don't see myself spending some more years in Norway. Norway is a lovely country, but the norwegian culture is a really dificult culture to unterstand (at least for a french girl like me :p ). I have tried to understand people, to understand the behaviours of norwegians, to understand their habits ; but even after more than one year i didn't get the answers to all my questions. I would never imagine that Norwegian culture could be so different from the French one for example. Also, I love sun, and winter time is hard to find some sun in Norway. What about the food?? I am still looking for the food in Norway hahaha just a joke, but serioulsy the food in Norway is a long story ;)

So after all these questions I have asked myself, all the hours thinking about my future, thinking about taking the right decision... I decided to not accept the offer from the company. I has been hard... hard also now to realize that I will be moving out of the country in less than 4 months. I enjoy my time here and I have friends in Oslo. I know that it will not be easy to leave Norway. Norway is today a part of my life!
I know also that a lot of people around me will not understand my decision, they will not understand how I can lose an opportunity as the one I had today...

Of course, today I am really scared! Scared about the future... But I think it is a normal feeling. As human, we are always afraid of things we do not know. So I know what I am losing by leaving Norway but I don't know where I will be in 4 months and in which country I will be working. I am scared to not find a job as good as I have in Norway. But that's part of life. Sometimes we have to take some risks!!
I am today confident with my decision, and I know that whatever happen I will not regret my choice. I believe in myself and I believe in my dreams. I am today following my heart without really knowing where I am going!! But that's excisting, isn't it? :)


So now my next steps is to think about what to do!
I will try to stay working in Electrolux somewhere in Europe probably ;) and maybe trying to be closer to my country and my family.

By the way I recommand to all of you to listen this video in case you don't know it yet:

http://fr.youtube.com/watch?v=UF8uR6Z6KLc